8 Things I Didn’t Learn in 2020

It was a weird year.

Originally posted on That Damn Optimist, a newsletter of long-form writing on culture, tech and a little bit of hip-hop.

Being the paragon of enlightenment that I am, I’ve written a grand total of two articles reflecting on years past.

One was 19 lessons I learned in 2019, which was like 15 lessons too long to be digestible. Another was Some Random Dude’s Top 10 Books of 2017 which, though technically accurate, made it sound like I read far more than 10 books that year and need to cull my list like it’s the damn Pulitzer Prize.

(What happened in 2018, you ask? Probably not much.)

A successful actress married some man with ginger hair and it was a big deal, it seems

But today is the last day of 2020. And it seems only right to reflect on this unusual year in an unusual way.

So here goes.

8 Things I Didn’t Learn in 2020

1. How to stay cool, calm and collected through a global pandemic

I shot into 2020 roaring with excitement, gliding on the high that comes with discovering the promise of freelance life, like it’s some secret the universe (or, at least, most educational institutions) have tucked into the far corner of the pantry.

Until that point, I worked hard to design a life that reflected my values — cementing healthy habits, meditating daily, writing consistently, checking off travel dreams, working for myself, seeing my family often.

And cheersing L’chaim with dubious Eastern European liquor

Then the ‘Rona came around and my parents’ favorite Yiddish saying about God hearing our plans and laughing hit hard.

I didn’t feel its impact right away. It was like those grainy videos of nuclear tests where you see the cloud from afar before its shockwave rocks the camera. Worse than the shockwave, though, was the radiation that remained in its wake: an ambient anxiety, a dull noise that seeped into every activity and every decision.

So, like many of us, I spent much of 2020 appearing strong for others while being anything but inside. Within, a cloudy…